Blustering poppy-cock

The cock in question being floppy-fringed TV personality and “politician”, Boris Johnson.

With the inherently absurd nature of the running media holocaust that is the expenses scandal (claims for moat cleaning, dog-food, etc. as well as the more serious and widespread claiming of second homes expenses) it was inevitable that the inherently absurd Boris would have to figure somewhere.

So here we have it: as an MP he once tried to claim for a Remembrance Day poppy wreath. Hardly grand fraud but there’s something disturbingly mean about the whole thing. Although to his credit The Mail reports “he had 'happily' paid the cost out of his own pocket when he was denied the refund”.

That’s big of you, Boris.

“Greasy-haired twat”

No, not Boris, who looks like he probably has quite a good hair-care regime, but the words used to describe a rival by a council candidate in a leaflet.

It’s shocking that the normally fluffy and loveable Lib Dems should stoop to such extreme language. Apparently it was actually a “prank” that went wrong, which also suggests, somewhat disconcertingly, that people in local politics might have a sense of humour behind closed doors.

For all the public indignation I think that this world of increasingly personality based politics could do with more straight-talking. Certainly Ms Pascoe would make a much better leader than Nick Clegg, who some might say is a smarmy prat. Not I, obviously, as that could be libellous.